Conscious Living

by: B.P.

I entered 3rd density in Bosnia ~ 40 years ago (still can't  remember what exactly did I plan for this liftime in the contemplation zone). At that time it was not a bad place for a start in comparison to others. After a short while I was pretty much programmed as the others, although I somehow managed not to get affected by one of the  major religions in that area (Orthodox Catholic and Islamic).  This gave me a little bit of space to balance. Most people at that time were run by Matrix Marxism with religious programs working quietly in the background.

My  first shock in my childhood was when I was told that in fact, although we were all alike, we are different in regards to religious background and I had to make demarcations as to which of my friends were Serbs, which were Croats or Muslims. I sensed all the time that something must have  been wrong, that the grouping of people in this way was spiritually repressive. 

I remember while still a child, looking once with a couple of friends at  the night sky, saying that we could be some sort of somebody's  experiment - something like laboratory animals - an I have  wondered long after what made me say something like this.

I went through our education system completing primary and  secondary school and then veterinary college, pretty much asleep at  that time, except that I had had an interest in anything paranormal -  now I can say - in glitches in the matrix.

Occasionally, in times of some sort of distress, when I was emotionally  charged, I sensed something as a presence of entities in my close  proximity (something as a cold blanket moving around myself) but my self - tranquilising system was working pretty well, so I could  rationalise that as my imagination and move forward. Discussing these things made you seem weird among your friends, too. Academic education and metaphysics do not get along well.

I followed the usual plan - finishing my studies -  getting a job - marrying in order to be happy.

I started working in Croatia and after a couple of years the war started. I was aware of the Noah story then, but although I received clear signs well before it started, I did not listen to them, I just engaged my wishful thinking - everything was going to be  fine, people are not that crazy etc. - so I did not leave the area in time.  

At times of great distress and disasters you can recognise organic  portals easily. When a war starts you cannot say that you want to stay neutral since the first thing you will hear is the famous Organic Portal proclamation: "If you are  not with us - you are against us".

I remember the emotionally charged atmosphere, the fear and terror. I sensed manipulation from behind the scenes and there was a great deal of frustration in not being able to define clearly the source.

Strangely, some people  reported "angel's hair" in the area, as well. (Maybe something to  facilitate feeding of 4D STS or residues of their propulsion system)?

I  think the wars are feasts for 4D STS denizens, maybe this is a  primary reason why they are being created by the help of their 3D agents.

Anyway, I managed somehow to extricate my wife and myself alive from there and returned to Sarajevo, in Bosnia. We were not harmed  physically and we managed not to harm anyone else.

At this time it was still peaceful there, but the signs of coming war came soon, and this time I was very receptive and responsive, so we  left the area just in time.  We arrived to Austria, from one matrix prison cell into another, but this one was, at least, more comfortable. We had to start at the bottom just to survive: Learning a new language, passing tests for cab driving (as my profession was not recognised and in order to stay in that cell you had to  have a visa, you could not get the visa if you do not have a job, and  you can not get a job if you do not have a visa). After 3 years, I moved  with my wife to Australia, aware that she as a Muslim  and I as a Serb can not go back to Bosnia even though the war is over.

Again, I had to start from the beginning; Learn the language, pass various tests and examinations and work at whatever I could find for survival. Skill recognition procedures, studying, cab driving again and finally just  before my final exam - something that crushed me almost completely. I had to release my "most  sacred cow" which was my marriage. My wife thought she would be  better off with one of her workmates and then just a couple of days  after the collapse of my marriage, one of my best friends died. I felt as though I had been stabbed in my back; I was broken into thousands of pieces; I was at the bottom of a pit without anybody below or around me.

I do not know  how I managed to recollect myself, but what was clear to me after I  regained myself I was not the same as before. I made myself study non-stop, with the help of some of my friends and passed the final  examination in veterinary science. Then I got a job far away from the town where I lived and started working. I finally had room to breathe.

Then I started to do more reading, first a few New Age books. At first glance I thought there could be something there, but I just could not  resonate to the “bucket of love and light” philosophy and state of being; it was just another trap/crap. Then I went trough David Icke’s books, then B. Marciniak, W. Bramley,  Castaneda and then few books on mind control.

I was delighted by the “Bringers of the Dawn.” While reading the book I got an  impression that I was already somehow familiar with the information presented, but deeply on a subconscious level.

After reading “Secret:  Don’t Tell” I got a picture of how prone to programming our mind is.  It shocked me when I read that at one lecture about hypnosis a guy  from the audience was given a post-hypnotic suggestion to stand up and  crow as a rooster whenever the lecturer touched his ear. Later, when the guy was asked why he was doing it, he “explained” - or  rationalised - that it was to improve the mood of the audience, as his mind  did not want to admit that he was programmed/conditioned to do that.

I  realised then that what I was doing all my life and most people I knew,  was crowing – and then rationalising the reasons for it. I started revising all I “knew” and “thinking with a hammer”.

When going through various websites in my search for truth I quickly  realised that with any given truth – several lies were  embedded. At the same time, somehow I came across the Cassiopaea  website. After reading Amazing Grace, Noah, The Wave, etc. something in myself told me that this lady must be on the  right track. Although my rational mind was fighting and trying to find a  glitch, as I was going trough the material numerous times - pieces of  the puzzle started coming together.  

I started emptying my “vessel” from matrix lies, releasing them from my receptors in order to make more place for truth, - and a lot of  frustration.  

I was scrutinising and revising everything I “knew”, deprogramming myself.  At the same time I was feeling alone as somebody who awakens in a dormitory where everybody else is asleep, not able to talk to or wake up anybody.

Anyway, Laura was asking and answering everything I was concerned  with. I realised that I have to look at my past as being perfect,  providing me with appropriate lessons I had to learn, often in a very hard way. New information coupled with experience became knowledge,  which increased my awareness and my free will.  At least, now I am able to choose freely. I may not be able to create,  but I feel I can better discern B influences and act upon them, and at  the same time – “gaining time” to gain more knowledge, as expressed  by Moravieff.  

I stopped judging in the way of determining the needs of others. I extricated  myself from energy suckers and stopped interfering with other people’s free will.

In order to catch up I started ordering and reading other books from  Laura’s reading list. Secret Teachings of All Ages, The Morning of the  Magicians, the 12th Planet, Ra Material, Techniques in Spirit  Releasement Therapy, then from Linda Molton Howe Strange Harvest,  J. Vallee - Passport to Magnolia, Revelations, R. Saunders - Kundaliny  Tales, J. Narby - Cosmic Serpent, Ouspensky - Fourth Way and In the  Search for Miraculous, Gurdjeff - Belsebub’s Tales, M. Kaku -  Hyperspace, K. Grimwood - Replay, books on history of the Middle  East etc. etc.

Recently I read the Ascension: the True Quest for the Holy Grail and  Occult Significance of 09/11. At the moment, I am reading K.G. Jung and Plato,  reviewing some of Cs material and waiting for all 3 vols. of Moravieff’s  Gnosis to arrive.

Although the knowledge about our reality I have gained during the last few years would be very disturbing for many people, (that is probably  why they regard ignorance as bliss), now I can say that I feel  more free than ever before and more self-confident.  I do not go through various sorts of "dramas" as before, I have much  less fear and much more faith, and for a long time I have not had all  sorts of accidents as I used to have before. I am living my life more  consciously with intention and without anticipation, although, I can admit that I often feel frustrated, thinking that my progress might be too  slow, but on the other hand, I am aware that I am learning at my own  pace.

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